What you don’t understand I don’t have to explain All the trash from my mouth washes down the drain If you don’t have a name for it, I don’t have to sign for it No one left to blame for it, I won’t go insane for it Everybody picks up the pieces of me, Wasted on the garbage of a burning black sea Nothing left inside but the basest of needs I’m nothing but a pile of outspent offerings With a fire deep inside, even flames can’t guide me Burning bridges not blazing trails, don’t mind me I’ll be explanation-free like predictable wildfire charring life Is what you don’t make of it, define the world within the negative Beautifully hemorrhaging the causes of a mind Bleeding out the truth that always kept us in line I’ll be in the middle of what I never find A quiet little moment always leaves you behind Sometimes all lack of hope and common wit Is all you need to move beyond the age-old bullshit That haunts your small face every moment you’re awake See the world for what it is, we’re all a bunch of sticky kids Don’t smile down on suffering, don’t wink like you won’t suffer in time Twitchy little guilty needs are all that I can satisfy Why should I feel bad if that’s all I can afford And every other hour I go back to being bored Break me Please break me open Tell me if I see anything worth holding on for dear life I hate you sincerely yours truly Is a life of burning blessed bloody blankets of fire It really inspires Me to get down on my knees and thank your good lord for self-pity Burning myself in a crouching position Tragic and noble self-sacrifice is just self-hatred in a thin disguise The worst part of being held under water, And suffocating only on the darkest of your dreams Pull your head above the darkness Choke only on the streams that were meant for you Is that I must infer that since the only way to rescue me is by myself Then the only origin of all this hell is that I did it to myself But the bloody hugs and kisses of confusion Will stop me point blank every time I try to yank myself free from it I can mix up every metaphor and simile with it cuz no one’s even listening to it When I hold my breath say please breathe me in And out, hold me under my own hatred and doubt Your trash eats at you Do you have the courage to let it go Your trash eats at you Do you have the courage to let it go Your trash eats at you Do you have the courage to let it go Your trash eats at you Do you have the courage to let it go To empty is to allow life There is no absolute To allow life there is no absolute To allow life there is no absolute To empty is to allow life There is no absolute To allow life there is no absolute To allow life there is no absolute I’m not waiting any longer for a breath to take I’m not waiting for any feelings to fake What if the only thing I feel is what I think But I think with my heart But the only thing I think with said heart Is that there’s nothing left to feel from the start Cuz all the world is farce But you’re not worth my outrage And even in a song, your bullshit has to be clever, But my wits are far long gone and forlorn at that I can summon them back should I wish You’re just not worth it One burning little kiss with the fire of disturbedness And I’m emptying out all my insides of all they ever harnessed Cuz skill is just another word for habit And habit’s just another word for repetition And repeating’s just another way of holding And holding’s just another way of keeping And keeping time is just another way to say you’re rhythmically inclined Which only means you make rigidity and fluidity make love together Which is just another way to say they fucked each other Like rabbits All because you can’t let go of your dirty little habits, Even when you’re happy to have it, Your own life knows you’ll never grab it Cuz you’re too busy grabbing yourself And you’d love to let go Just gimme a minute And every name for mental masturbation has some truth in it And that is all that addiction is, Namely all the fiction that the world says it is Which is, to be exact, something only has-been’s and hacks Fall prey to, So fall down and pray that you Will never succumb too As well, while you’re down there, Take a look above and around And tell me all the functional men and women Bound for sensible lives and fields of work and study Don’t publicly shuttle their basest little beasts of desire around with them Not just bound to be some, but proven to be all Observably so, So that all you see when you’re prone to take in the disease Are men and women sustaining all their existent needs On not a medicine, not a cure, not even an overused, not an abused medication But the sickness itself It’s not an overstated truth to say the points you make are insatiable little trivial Explosively simple burningly solitary greeds Pointing back toward nothing but themselves Their only satisfaction is more of what they haven’t gotten Everybody trained not to not need People trained to need what they do not And so hot headed about it Because they can’t move their little faces away from the only things they see Which are mirrors everywhere, Constantly shining a light down upon them As if the harness in place around their souls Were anything but darkness filling in the holes That the harness makers drilled in to them To make them need the darkness to fill them in Which darkness we all see as the light of our shining selves Smiles back to me in your carefully crafted funhouse mirror Funny funny, and beautifully true That is me! Is it not? How could not it be? Oh god. The terribly ridiculous truth is In fact, none of it is beauty It is unbearably vicious Unfortunately, It is still, in fact and in fiction, As true as truth gets. For all the pretty shades of my grateful little insides Are really the bloody hell house in which we all reside And being so hooked on hell, I am never an anomaly I am only a far more honest version Of the world’s perversion Please break me. Please take me inside of you. Please break me inside you. So that I may feel someone else’s light Aside from my own Shining through them I am done with that reflection I’m done with that reflection Silly notion It’ll be my extinction You don’t understand There’s nothing to hold onto And there’s nothing we haven’t held.

Good morning, All my beautifully twisted up souls, Tied tight to your unknown egos, I pitch a question to quiet minds (And to the burningly miserable intellect of a generation that so nobly denounces it): (Everybody sing along to this one) What to do When all that you Had trusted Peaceful and sturdy piton of trust Instead of hitting bedrock Hits rock bottom, Pitiful python, sizably deadly, but venom-less Dead weight needs a sizable impetus But the man that you had lain with Is now a pack of wild-horses Some say cut your losses, Hard pill to swallow When suddenly all analogies Are out the window And suddenly all your similes Are like galoshes Trailing all your dirty weather Up and down your quiet carpeting And in a moment You can only think to strip your mind Of all its heavy winter layering Sit peaceful now in your altogether Each and every minute of your many mangled Mixed up metaphoric rambles Leads you to believe you’ve been deceived And that you mustn’t miss a beat In trampling your only biggest enemy Right under your own two feet, But that pill ain’t so damn hard to swallow But something now you eagerly greet And this blind leader you humbly follow And this sick poison you readily eat “Will it make my nagging insides fly away from me?” And I answer, only if you’re willing To flitter away all conscious choice on these Now tell em Make a little fold on a page in your book Put you on hold for a dirty little look But I’m not tired, I’m not that powerful And I’m not dying, there’s no such animal Look at my blood, still shaking to silence me Over eager, good intentions, violent man, violating Form a little crease on the edges of acceptable And make a little note that your thoughts are inexcusable Having sailed the same boat I know it’s not so nice to feel the anchor start to float But as mutinies show, You must abandon all your needs to let go, And let go of all your needs to abandon, I know It doesn’t make any sense, Nothing ever does And that is only because we think that it should, But nothing is ever bad, And everything is always good We just can’t amputate The cold brats of our psyche With no way to replace What cannot be detached in the first place, Cuz your peaceful feeling is fleeting Now floundering In its momentary ecstasy, All at once turned into a misery, And I thought, This silent heaven is starting to wear off (More please) The silent killer self, In my attempts to delete it Was only concealed under it, And Under cover of the menacing toxin Meant to wipe it out Was only whited out, And could now Under the shade of my own indifference, Readily unleash all the spiteful wrath of its own brazen existence Make a little fold on a page in your book Put you on hold for a dirty little look But I’m not tired, I’m not that powerful And I’m not dying, there’s no such animal Look at my blood, still shaking to silence me Over eager, good intentions, violent man, violating Form a little crease on the edges of acceptable And make a little note that your thoughts are inexcusable I, I, anatta, nobody I, I, anatta, nobody I, I, anatta, nobody I, I, anatta, nobody And how does one Unravel the knot In which one has tied oneself Without unraveling said self And yes, we may ask the question In a calm kind of earnest, But is it not in fact The burningest notion of all, namely The sudden unraveling of decency In favor of Tranquility Medicinally Induced in me Produced a kind of Reverse rapidity A sudden and very quick Slowing down of all my wits And while I was for a number of minutes In a bliss and in an indescribable peace I had only to be reminded of The clamoring world directly above me My silent sea, my still ocean But my poor scape-goated ego In exile Little anchor now felt such anger Meant to make me feel the murderousness Of all the meaningless I had Imprinted on its existence In other words, It saw that I sought to suppress a bottomless pit And the absurdity inherent in this For emptiness cannot be forced down Will not succumb to force for the sake Of what you call real Over and above it Will not stand for force for the sake of force But perhaps for the sake of farce May make you repent a little For belittling the only wits you have left within you So never believe for a moment That you can out wit That gaping, glaringly actual nothingness Inherent in all your attempts at betterment Because, believe me son, All this silliness will only lead to bitterness Our wits will always out wit us They will always come out Still sitting on top of us And there will never be any doubt ever Whose ego had the better Of the most diabolically confused attempts To blot it out to its bloody ends I should have left, as the wisely careless say, Well enough alone And held my fallible little ego As something to own Oh, and it’s nearly impossible, but still so admirable I will own my blown over ego Instead of owning up to an inescapably feeble and failed attempt to let go of it Burning and miserable intellect (I’ll slow down to reattach it) So good night My burning egos, Let he who sleeps the soundest Cast the first stony glare of distrust and indifference For there is none around you who has not felt the buzzing hum Of their own unignorable emptiness (I, I, Anatta, Nobody) They say let go of yourself But there’s nothing left to let go of Say let go of yourself But there’s nothing left to let go of (I, I, Anatta, Nobody)

Crouched here, In my missile, defenseless Comfortable, Watching bullets wash over my metal From my standpoint, It’s not at all like Hell Cuz I’m numb to it now, And there’s no telling how It came to this This anti-bliss, I can’t even make a fist but I’m restless as hell So get me outta this chamber ring the bells and glory glory I’ll tell you a story, fairly boring and barely starting: How I made it past the parting, past the thwarting waves to save my life. (I was in a bad place, terrifically deep below the surface of what people call “reality”, don’t mind if I mix my metaphors sometimes it’s called for.) Get up now, Jump on top of the ones who keep you down Get up now, Jump on top of the ones who keep you down And if you don’t know how, Just watch the ones who know how to get it done Cuz broadly speaking, sometimes fighting back can be a lot of fun I promise not to give you any specific information about my life, While I quite generically wax over a few of my most intense gripes On second thought, I pledge not to wax at all I’ll just hand it over, all my frustration in a hardened little ball No specifics: just the absolute escape of scream Not so angry now, just toss it out there, remember we’re a team I’ll catch your rage, play hot potato, just lettin off some steam It’s never a cliche when my baby gets mad at the machine Get up now, Jump on top of the ones who keep you down Get up now, Jump on top of the ones who keep you down And if you don’t know how, Just watch the ones who know how to get it done Cuz broadly speaking, sometimes fighting back can be a lot of fun So listen here, my ecstasy is a kind of rageful empowerment It’s all rather generic, when you’re a general heretic What’ve you got for me to stand against, I’m fenced in And I wanna make broad, sweeping rebellion just to make sure that I’m tellin him About the furious merriment sentiment, dadaistic blissful ballistics And if I had to pin it down, I think I’d mostly blame the clown Who drugged me up in such high doses, contributed to my psychosis Which cost me a job as the economy tanked, which was especially thanks To the lunatistically capitalistic, deregulatedly financially fascistic False derivative-deriving selfish and conniving economic mystics And in the midst of this, I’m unemployed with a sickness So I thought, louder and louder, till I whispered louder and louder, till I mumbled louder and louder, till I spoke, louder and louder, till I affirmed, louder and louder, till I yelled, louder and louder, till I shouted, louder and louder, till I screamed, louder and louder, till I lost my voice a hundred billion times, and it was just the sound of prison bars struck like chimes Get up now Jump on top of the ones who keep you Jump on top of the ones who keep you down Get up now Jump on top of the ones who keep you Jump on top of the ones who keep you down

I try to stay focused Stand on my toes to feel the sun When I try to unfold Everything gets cold and I know that I’m not the one (2x) But that’s just current future, talking to me, It says I’m less than naught, and I’ll never be free And I’m nothing, just a stain on the map, Too restless to think, too tired to change that The space in my spirit, though, is bridged and back Cuz across the pond I see beyond the gap So despite all the space they say separates our faces We’ll each of us refuse to keep our psyches in their places So everybody make a constellation with your fellows And if you think you make a hollow sound when you really bellow Open up your eyes and your hands and your throats And stand up with the broken nothing, harmonize with something crushing You found the sound that shatters what matters Your tunes tell me that I’m already free Your noise gives girls and boys the most joys And even though we’ve never met I think we’d make a nice duet So beat on the keys like a slow disease I’ll chant the words to a circular breeze And maybe this is what a happy dead god sees Cuz death is happy for a god to get up off his knees Now I’m nervous from sitting so frozen in place I’m desperate and I’m raving but I’m quiet cuz I’m caving in I can’t keep looking at the same cold thoughts And all the battles that I coulda won if I’d only fought I’m frustrated like dogs that wanna be men Concentrated raging apathy uninterested catastrophe There ain’t a lot I care for, but burning on the sun And I know that I’m not the only one So beat on the keys like a slow disease I’ll chant the words to a circular breeze And maybe this is what a happy dead god sees Cuz death is happy for a god to get up off his knees Open the box and see what we become Trials with styles ad infinitum Maybe we’re shady but we’re not a system Just a smoldering psalm, and a feverish calm (and a feverish calm) Everything, everywhere Everything in the sun, now Burning free, just to be New to the world like I wouldn’t believe (2x) Free to be sunspots on the sun Standing Tall To Cataclysm Everyone go get yourself some Standing Tall To Cataclysm